Neerja's Musings

THE BOSS WOMAN SAYS IT ALL !

All through our lives, we are always making efforts to be happy But what is the answer to this million dollar question – “What makes us happy?”


Prior to corona days, one can go out and have favourite food at some good food joint and lo,the mood is uplifted. This results in  instant happiness. Many a times, the happiness comes from first few bites and thereafter they will be seen as added layers of fat and a higher number on weighing scale. 😛

Retail therapy also brings in happiness. This mode has been changed over to online shopping for most of people and it worked same way as off line shopping for me.  I burnt some of my hubby’s hard earned money but lasting happiness was still eluded me. I use the debit card linked to his account and not mine, just to keep his account active. 🙂 What a caring wife I am.

I have a weakness for footwears. So buying a nice, smart and comfy pair of shoes from my favourite brand Bata, uplifts my mood for some time and I know when is the  time to get another pair….and it goes on.Greedy me !:P

These instant mood uplifters may bring happiness and relaxation for some time. But today, I am exploring for the longer lasting source of joy. Is it there or not?

Some also say that happiness is said to be a state of mind. It is a state of “well-being and contentment.” Some people say, “Don’t pursue happiness, seek joy. Happiness is fickle and fading, joy remains forever.”

In my opinion, the long-term experience of life satisfaction is almost certainly made up of many short-term feelings of joy and pleasure. Not every day is a great day and we are faced with  trials, turbulations, temptations, or downturns. It means that when we look back at the many seasons of life, we may look back satisfied at how we had navigated the trials and turbulations which situations have thrown at us. This long-term feeling of  satisfaction  in life is  the moment  when we embrace the emotion of joy.

Is it possible to learn to be happy? Is there something that can be intentionally practiced to remain happy?

We can accomplish that by taking steps each day to be happy.

Here are some tips on how to be happier starting today.

1.Prioritize Happiness:
The most important thing about happiness is that it is not an outcome of current circumstances but just the opposite.  It is a choice which we have to opt for.This is easier on some days  but if you get caught in the trap of thinking that your circumstances need to change before you can be happy, you’ll never, ever get there.

2. Focus on your blessings.
Focus on the good things in your life at the moment. Like you are alive,  have food on the table, roof on your head, good health,  have family and friends, and you have opportunities each day to pursue meaningful work. Not all of these may be  true for you right now, but certainly some of them are—which means there is good in your life that you can focus on.

Happiness is about perspective and if you’re looking for reasons to be happy, you’ll probably find them.Always focus on positive thoughts to be happy.

3. Avoid Comparison.
No matter how you choose to define happiness—short-term or long-term—comparison will rob you of it. Comparism of  finances, body type,  vacations,  talents,  house size, there are no winners in the game of comparison. But nobody is forcing you to play this game! You can stop any time you want. Be grateful for what you have, appreciate who you are, work hard every day to live your best life, and stop comparing yourself to others.

4. Practice Gratitude and Generosity
In the world of positive psychology,  gratitude and generosity  emerge winners every time happiness is studied.

These can only be understood when we see them as disciplines rather than responses. A discipline is something we practice regardless of our circumstances. If you are waiting for enough money to become generous, you’ll never get there. Similarly if you are waiting for everything to be perfect to be grateful, you’ll never experience it. Choose to be thankful today. Be generous with your time and money by making them both a discipline in your life. It will result in a happier today and joyfull tomorrow.

5. Don’t pursue physical possessions
Possessions are necessary for life, but our society has seemed to confuse consumerism with happiness. Marketers work hard to convince us that their products are not just required for life, but that they are essential for happiness also. Slowly we begin to believe their empty promises and waste our lives pursuing things that can never satisfy us. We sacrifice time, money, energy in chasing and accumulating things we do not need.

These excess possessions become a cause of worry and burden in our lives. If you want to become a bit happier today, go declutter a closet or drawer and begin to challenge consumerism in your life.

6. Value Relationships
One thing that  has  been confirmed by studies  is that relationships hold the key to happiness. Close relationships, more than money or fame, are what keep people happy throughout their lives. Those ties protect people from life’s discontents, help to delay mental and physical decline, and are better predictors of long and happy lives than social class, IQ, or even genes.

We don’t  control every aspect of our relationships (for example we didn’t choose our relatives ). But we can all take steps to be a good friend. Good friends tend to attract healthy community.

7. Develop Healthy Habits
“How we spend our days decides how we spend our lives.” This is an old saying. Our lives are filled with days, our days are filled with hours, and this present hour is filled with whatever you chose to fill it with. So pursue healthy habits that add value to your hours, days, and lifetime.

Spend time outside. Eat healthy. Exercise regularly. Put down your mobile phone. Work hard. Pray often. And get enough sleep.

8. Look Beyond Self
Being self centred is the new anthem. It comes naturally to us – self love, self-survival, self-promotion, self-actualization, and self-exaltation.

But the most efficient pathway to lasting happiness and fulfillment is not to look only at your own interests, but also to the interests of others. When we shift our focus away from ourselves, we move towards a life of greater meaning and  contribution. When we serve others any expectation, we experience the beauty of selfless love. The size of our universe (and happiness) begins to expand exponentially.

It is no small thing that happiness is pursued by so many. Let’s make sure we find it—in both the short term and the long term.

Be Happy !

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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